91. How Can You Evangelize to Young Adults?

Have you ever been 'evangelized' to? 
What did it feel like? What emotions did it evoke?

Here's the truth: evangelism can be unsettling. Why is that, and is there a better way to reach non-believers with the good news of the gospel? 

The answer to that question starts with evaluating WHY non-believers are turned off to Christianity in the first place. So, in this episode of Christian Curious, we chat with Asia Nicholson, the young adult leader at The Bridge Ministry at First Baptist Church of Glenarden, to do just that. 

These are some of the questions we explore:

- What is a sustainable young adult ministry, and what are some steps to create one?
- What questions are young adults who are not Christians asking? What are they processing?
- Why are Christians so uncomfortable with evangelizing to non-believers?
- How can you engage nonbelievers?

Learn more at christiancurious.com

Instagram: @christiancurious
Twitter: @XnCurious
Facebook: @ChristianCuriousOnAir

Transcript

I ad­mit it: I’m not a great evan­ge­liz­er. Most­ly be­cause I re­mem­ber what it is like to be evangelized to: Chris­tians from in­tact homes whose par­ents paid for every­thing in college. The truth of the gospel did not res­onate with me then, from those peo­ple, who knew not the pain of fi­nan­cial strug­gle or the sec­u­lar world. 

 This is Chris­t­ian Cu­ri­ous and I’m your host, Dr. Halee Gray Scott. Each week, we tack­le some of the hard­est, most press­ing ques­tions fac­ing Chris­tians in the 21st centu­ry. To­day, I am con­tin­u­ing my con­ver­sa­tion with Asia Nichol­son, a leader in the Wash­ington, D.C. area. 

Asia, wel­come back to the show!

 Halee: 

Asia, you are an extremely incredible leader in the Washington D.C. area of Christian young adults. And for those who might not have caught the last episode, when you discussed your testimony, could you share a little bit about your journey to Christ?

Asia:

Yeah, so I wasn't raised explicitly Christian, but my mom definitely was a Christian. My dad dabbled in being Muslim for a little bit when I was a teenager. And so, I think that they just kind of handed me over to God and let him introduce himself to me as he would. That really helped my faith walk because I had a really gentle experience of God's revelation of Himself to me. 

I carry that gentleness and how I approach people who do have questions about God. My own questions encouraged me to tell people to ask their own questions, and to just remind them that God is whoever you need him to be to you. And that is how I experienced God. And so, I'm always excited to tell people that God is not offended by any questions you have about the faith--about Christians, about what we are to believe, simply because that is just not who God is.

Halee:

You know, it sounds like you're very comfortable in your faith. I think that the problem for some people who want to evangelize, or some people who want to enter into discussions about certain culture issues, including abortion, refrain from doing so because they're afraid to engage. They're not secure in their own positions. I think that that would be one of the very first things that you would need to know in order to evangelize. You would need to be firm in your faith and certain about what you believe.

What is your ministry like today with young adults? What do you do?

Asia:

So, I am the director of a ministry called The Bridge at the First Baptist Church of Glenarden. And we this year, we've really focused on cultivating sustainable community in such a way that people feel comfortable being vulnerable with one another. Right now, there's definitely a pseudo-element of vulnerability that we have due to internet culture People either overshare or pick and choose what they share to the point where it negatively affects the life of another person. And so, creating a literal, in-person community of people, Christian or not, that are comfortable sharing some of their apprehension, some of the questions and fears and anxieties surrounding the Christian faith has been something that we've been focusing on. 

Thankfully, God has kind of put me in a position where, because of my experience with being comfortable, and being encouraged to ask him questions, I can encourage my leaders to do the same and posture themselves to be receptive to people who do have questions. Then, the community isn't based in a human truth, but God's truth. The truth is that He's sovereign, whether we believe it or not, and that He's holy, whether we believe it or not. That doesn't mean that God is a dictator. It just means that we were created to serve Him, and ultimately, that we will come to know truth as God reveals Himself to us each day. Honestly, I just make sure that we understand that very fundamental truth and lead from the that place.

Halee:

When you talk about sustainable community, can you explain what you mean? One of the biggest challenges that churches faced in our study was building a sustainable community because of the transient nature of young adults. Even young adult leaders made it hard to create a group that was, you know, sustainable. Firstly, what is a sustainable community? How do you define that, and how do you build it?

Asia:

I think sustainable is something that would exist whether there was a leader or not. So, I tried to make sure that my leaders have the same access to the knowledge and the platforms that I have as the director. If I were to not be there, they shouldn't only feel comfortable around me, because I'm the director, right? Like I acknowledge the different relationships I have with people, but sustainable means that if there was no leader, the group should still feel comfortable enough and feel God's presence in the building. 

Sustainable also means that they could go out and feel encouraged to create a duplicate of the community wherever they are. You know, some of them are only here for the summer because they live on-campus, they're in college out of state, or they might not have reliable transportation. There are so many different factors to access that people have.

So, we allow the group to be accessible online, for example. And literally, having God's presence be accessible wherever they are is something that's important. Our last event was online, and we just went over a devotional that we did as a group on Zoom. That was helpful for people. There was someone from Chile there who said that they follow me on Instagram--that was cool. Literally creating a community of people, no matter where you are, where you feel like you can access God's presence in the midst of young adults who also have the same feelings that you do is something that's super important. So that's how I define sustainable community. 

Halee:

I want to know what you hear young adults talking about? What do you hear about their frustrations and the things that they're struggling with right now?

Asia:

I usually always take the defense of non-believers simply because Christians kind of know the answer. You just want to argue for no reason. So, I sometimes view Christians as the sometimes bratty little sibling, but I am going to edify them after I talk about non-believers. 

I hear nonbelievers, young adults who are not Christians, talk about Christians being super apprehensive about speaking out about blatant injustice. For example, I recently lost 30 Instagram followers or so after I posted an essay after the Roe vs. Wade ruling came out. I was saying something along the lines that I didn't think the ruling was going to help; I don't think that they should have done that. I lost so many followers after that because I think Christians think you have to have a sure opinion on everything. Sometimes we confuse illegal with righteous and illegal with holy. Like being Black was illegal--you think that's holy, you know what I mean? The two are not mutually exclusive. So, making something illegal and then putting it in the name of God is ridiculous to me. The first thing we do in the Court of the United States is swear on the Bible. And it's like we are not a Christian nation. S, we don't have the basics of Christianity. What I see frustrates a lot of non-believers about Christians is that we don't even have the basics down. We don't treat people as human. There are people living in poverty. I don't even understand the concept of a billionaire. There's no reason we should be going to space. Those cool galaxy photos? I guess they're fun. I'm sure I've seen them on Tumblr somewhere. But why? Why are we spending $10 billion on that, you know, like literal resources being wasted on things that have no eternal value and have no help for human beings? You know? 

Halee:

What you're saying is that instead of looking so far outwards, you want churches to step in the gap and actually address the social issues that we see happen. 

Asia:

We don't value human life at all. That’s why I think a lot of people were literally in pain and grieving over the Roe versus Wade situation, because that was not a discernment on human life. And, and I can understand why people thought it was a good thing. But to completely miss the grief that people were feeling, I think, was an error on the part of a lot of Christians. We were so focused on winning (which is so strange) that it's like you're missing why people are grieving. And instead of asking or inviting a community of non-believers into your life, where you can understand why people would feel aggrieved, we instead felt like we've won some type of battle or war. And that's what I see grieves a lot of non-believers, because to a lot of them, Christians seem very war minded and like it's a fight between right and wrong. God is so much bigger than than our moralistic approach to human life. If we just approach human life with the grace that God does, I think that we would all realize how alike we are. Situations are so different when you are in them yourself. 

Halee:

Well, you know, it's a pretty strong statement to say that Christians don't care for other humans. You’ve filled out what you mean pretty well. By not caring for other humans, you mean rather than standing for certain principles, we should actually listen for a little bit?

Asia:

Yeah. Like I said in the previous episode, I just was talking about how I love my church, First Baptist Church of Glenarden, because of how much we do in the local community. So, there are Christians who do care, and I think that non-believers know that. I personally don't feel the need to qualify the good that Christians do because if we do it, they'll know it. You will know a tree by its fruit. I don't need to qualify the fact that I love people if I'm actually loving people, right? And so, I think that when we get defensive and claim that there are good Christians in the world. It's like, okay, well let’s just be good Christians. Be like Jesus and be the Fruit of the Spirit. 

And, and now, that's not to say that offense doesn't sometimes irritate Christians or even irritate me, because there's some outlandish things that people will say about Christianity. And it's like, alright, well, I understand why you're saying that. However, part of being a believer is hearing things said about Christians that are blatantly untrue. And so, to me, the question becomes are we willing to go deeper and engage the person? Or are we just going to stay on the level of offense, dismiss them, and completely miss an opportunity to connect and hear them out? Because as we know, the people who shout the loudest have usually never been given a chance to speak. And so, I'm more willing to engage with someone who is blatantly wrong but is still willing to engage with me genuinely than dismiss them because, you know, I got my feelings hurt.

Halee:

Just see the people behind the positions. And try to walk alongside people in their shoes and understand what it means. I mean, you still may arrive on the same point. If we want to use the example of Roe versus Wade, I'm pretty firm in the pro-life camp. I wasn't until I volunteered at a crisis pregnancy center. But that doesn't mean that I don't understand why women find themselves in that place. I'm still pro-life, but I get how people are hurt by the decision, I get that. To be able to start with a dialogue and to understand is powerful. It’s like, okay, so, you know, maybe I was not, you know, responsible, whenever I decided to go hook up, or whatever, and I got pregnant. But now I have to live with the fact that there is something in my body. And that's fair, you know, some women have--and I may be going so far off the rails here--great pregnancies, and some people have very bad pregnancies. And you have to live with the fact that you're bringing another life, into the world through your body. It's very private, and it's very personal. And even when a baby is wanted, pregnancy is very hard. And so, if you, if you are pro-life, take a step back and say, I understand where you're coming from. Until you are able to do that, you can't get people over to your side.

Asia: 

Yeah. And to your point, anything forced is feels violent. We just talked about how God is such a gentleman, and God doesn't force us to do anything. And then we’ll go on and be like “Thank God, people are now forced to do this.” And it's like, hold on. Now, this didn't sound like what I just heard you say two weeks ago. Even the terms we have, such as “pro-life”, are absolute. Or, for instance, when the antithesis to Black Lives Matter is that All Lives Matter. All of those absolutes actually don't make sense when we put them in context to what the original was trying to say in the first place. 

So it's like, of course they do! That's why we're saying black lives matter? Or, of course, everyone is pro-life. That's why we're worried about you going to space when like, there are forest fires happening. You know what I mean? So, we lose the vision when we take the terms and make an antithesis in an attempt to show who God truly is. We can't take God out of His holy context without consulting him. And I just hear a lot of grief on both sides. 

You know, to your point of what I hear young adults saying, it sounds like we're trying to hear the heart of God, but we're flawed. And because we're all fallen, we speak in language that is so far from who God is. Because we speak quickly and out of anger, we don't consult, you know, the Spirit. So, sometimes words fall flat. They fall on deaf ears, they hurt, and they cut, and it leads to further division, which is hard. 

Ultimately, I think that's what those small hubs of sustainable community can help do. They foster a lengthier conversation that allows for people to actually hear one another. In those spaces, you see the body language, you see when someone's getting uncomfortable, and you can be like “oh, maybe I’m going to stop here, because I don't want to make you uncomfortable. And ultimately, your life is way more important to me than me being right or wrong. Like I don't care if I'm right or wrong. The fact that you are here breathing and alive is way more important to me than making you feel like you just got told in this conversation.”

Halee:

I totally agree. I think that is one of the most important things we need to consider whenever we enter into dialogue with people of differing opinions: that these are human beings created in the image of God just like me, and they're loved by God just like me. And, you know, to respect that before we enter into a question. 

One of the things that I've heard you talk about and that we've talked about before is how uncomfortable Christians who have always been Christians are about evangelizing to non-Christians, or even making friends with non-Christians. So, in our last few final minutes, if you were to give a tutorial for Christians who grew up in a Christian environment, or who have been in a Christian environment for a very long time, what are some of the things that they need to do to actually engage non-believers?

I think having a Christian friend who can engage non-believers can help them as a buffer. I think that sometimes it can be scary, and I don't want to invalidate anyone's, you know, maybe concerns about befriending non-believers, because they might have been taught that they will literally be condemned to hell if they befriend an unbeliever. So, I want to be sensitive to that, and some of the spiritual abuse that people might have gone through that would have led them to that. But I think that having a friend who's willing to be a buffer would be beneficial to both the non-believer and the believer, because there would be something of a gentle intercessor that could help them navigate that new world. 

Putting yourself out there is uncomfortable, and I think we're all going to be uncomfortable to a certain extent. My advice would be to seek out someone who believes in the Word of God, stands firm on their convictions, walks in the Fruit of the Spirit, and is willing to walk with you in forming relationships with people who don't look like you, who don't believe as you do, and who don't have the same convictions as you. 

Halee:

Yeah, that's amazing. So, you What would you guess, would your second piece of advice be to intentionally and passionately pursue the Fruits of the Spirit?

Asia:

Yeah, I mean, I would say read your Bible, for sure. Because I think people try to walk like Jesus without knowing what He said. And that can cause a lot of harm to people and ourselves. And, you know, start at the gospel. I like to tell people try Luke, it's just easy to understand. People often start at Genesis and are like, “What the heck, and I don’t get it,” and I said the same thing. So, start at Luke or John, and just read about what Jesus did. And then take it take your time, literally just ask God be like, “Hey, God, what does this say?” And that just say those words literally and allow The Holy Spirit to show you how to walk in the Fruits of the Spirit. 

You can't separate the spirit from the person from which it came. Allow for God's word to show you revelations of himself in real life. That has been something that really helps me. And I think that that's something that I would encourage people to do.

Halee:

Why do you think people are hesitant to engage people outside the faith?

Asia:

I think one part of it is of spiritual abuse. People have literally been told that if they commune with non-believers, they will be condemned to hell. One of my seminary classes right now is on church history. You’d be surprised how many people in the Roman Catholic Church or the English church or what have you back in like, the 15th and 16th century, we're told that they were heretics because they were Protestant and were killed quite literally because they didn't believe in the authority of the papacy or because they didn't believe that the Pope had any legitimacy. So, people were literally killed. And I think that that the fruit of that has been shown and how we treat other people. You hear about people being different Don't from their family, for dating outside of their race or even being gay, like you hear you just hear nonsense of people literally disowning members of their family because of how they live. And so yeah, I think that they've been taught that. And I think that that is a form of spiritual abuse and just manipulation and such, which is why you have this whole deconstruction movement. I want to honor the fact that they're even brave enough to come and speak out about some of the stuff that they've endured. But I do think that's why people are kind of afraid to engage because of how they've been taught. And they've seen God as kind of like a dictator, versus someone who literally became incarnate in our world, to save us from ourselves, and to reconcile us back to him. And I think that when you're introduced to the Gospel through what Jesus has already done, then it would be easier to commune with people. Because it's like, oh, cool, like, I can tell them what Jesus did. And I can just live it out. And then they'd be willing to ask, “Oh, what God do you serve?” You know, like, “Oh, your light is so bright. Why is that?”

Halee:

You know, that's exactly what happened with me. Asia, thank you so much for being on the show. 

Asia:

Thank you. I loved it. 

Halee:

I did too. I think you're a wonderful human. And I'm so glad to know you.

Asia:

Thank you so much. I really appreciate it.

Halee: 

You've been listening to Christian Curious with Dr. Halee Gray Scott.